Does our past define who we are, and our actions?

This blog is one that I have to tread lightly upon writing about, but yet I feel compelled to write this blog because it explains a little bit about who I am....

I am the way I am because of the things I've experienced in my past, things I'm experiencing now, and I'm hoping to learn life lessons from the things I'm learning now, so that I don't carry the bad ish into my future...

Anyways, I was sitting and pondering why I act the way I do, and I think it goes back to childhood, and not fully dealing with some of the things that I should have dealt with, but instead, pushed it aside like it never existed. I don't like to open old wounds and hurts because all that is going to do is simply make issues worse..

I know that I carry some of my parents traits, whether good or bad, and the bad --- well ---- I don't want to carry the bad. We grow up and watch our parents make mistakes, and then vow to never make the same mistakes they did...Sometimes I think I get so focused on making sure history never repeats itself...but sometimes....history does repeat itself, and I find myself mimicking what I've seen or heard. By me being the copycat, I'm obviously sabotaging things for myself, and that must stop.

I'll give an example...For instance, one side of my family is known for drinking a lot...So being true to the family name, I can drink a lot myself. It's not something to brag about or boast about, but I can most definitely hold my own. There was a point for me in college where I was drinking every single day...couldn't go a day without a drink...why???? Simply because that is what I saw growing up, and that is what I justified as normal....But of course, I reprogrammed my train of thought, and stopped with the drinking, cuz it's obviously stupid, and stopped myself from the path of destruction I was well on my way to being on....I didn't have to join an AA group or anything like that, and I didn't quit drinking cold turkey, b/c I obviously still drink today, but the point is, I was copying stuff I had no business copying....

I have better examples, but that's all I feel like sharing...lol

This blog is not going to make sense to anybody probably, but that's okay, I know what I'm talking about. I guess what I'm trying to say is, there are things from my past that happened so frequently, and so often, that it's hard to not carry those things with me into the present. The problem is, I need to let those things go, but it's hard to. So the question I pose is, how do you let go of something that happened in the past that was so monumental that it impacts you in the present?